Thursday 7 January 2010

my boyfriend is anoying because...

01. Despite him being a skilled carpenter our house looks like something from homes from hell or DIY SOS. He is quite happy to take toilets out, take carpets up, take doors off but then seems to get bored at the next stage of actually doing something useful.
02. He has stolen my garage. We bought a house with a garage except I haven't seen it in about a year. I no longer have a garage in my eyes. I have a 'man space'. Therefore I am paying a mortgage on a '3-bed house with man space'. Hmmph.
03. All the mugs also disappear to the man-space. It's not until there is not a single mug left in the house that he thinks to bring them in, often containing mold and yukky stuff. Then he has the audacity to place them next to the washing up bowl, like it is then MY job to deal with them??!??
04. He is incapable of boiling the right amount of pasta
05. He just says stupid things
06. He plays the x-box more than my 13 yr old son. That doesn't mean I want my son to play more. I want my son to play less but this is always met with ' but he's played it for (insert no. of hrs conveniently calculated by some x-boxy thing) hours more than me' . The 'he's an adult so he can' line doesn't seem to make sense in my head because surely being an adult he shouldn't be wasting his time on such crap.
07. He spends a stupid amount of time in bed; Sometimes when I am at work, which really winds me up.
08. He still thinks being annoying is a form of affection. It is not. It is just annoying.
09. If he ever cleans or washes up he seems to have it in his head that he is doing it for me... err so I'll expect thanks and praise every time I breathe shall I?
10. He is incapable of going to the shop and buying food for more than one meal.
11. ...unless he is buying reduced bread, when he will buy 20 loaves then watch them go off. Yes luv, great bargain.
12. He will say things like 'oh, I wouldn't go to school in this weather. If it was up to me I'd let you stay at home' as a joke.
13. He smokes and it stinks.
14. He eats pork scratchings and they stink.
15. Rather than put empty pork scratching packets in the bin, he prefers to hide them under the sofa, where the smell can linger a bit longer. Delightful.
16. He will put one item in the washing machine, then put that one item in the dryer, then not even wear the damn thing.
17. He does not listen.
18. He makes these annoying snorting up noises then denies it.
19. He acts like my car is his car.
20. He has no comprehension of what I put up with on a daily basis (i.e. all of the above)!!!


(This is what you get if you spend 8 years with someone who you didn't really think would last more than a few weeks)

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